Thursday, December 18, 2008

Holiday Eating Tips

This is a gem of advice I found:


1. Avoid carrot and celery sticks. Anyone who puts that on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit. In fact, if you see carrots & celery, leave immediately. Go next door, where they're serving fudge.

2. Drink as much eggnog as you can. And quickly. It's rare. You cannot find it at any other time of year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It's a treat. Enjoy it. Have one for me. Have two. It's Christmas!

3. Do NOT have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a Christmas party is to eat other people's food for free. Lots of it. Hello!

4. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year's. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is the time for R&R, which you'll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog. Besides, shopping and wrapping all day every day uses a lot of muscles and burns tons of calories.

5. If you don't feel full and have a sugar-buzz when you leave the party, stuff your napkin fully before heading out the door. Savor the drive home.

Remember this: Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body; but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, diet coke in the other, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO, what a ride!"

Have a great holiday season.


Liz said...

AMEN!! I love that last paragraph - I think it's going to be my new motto. Cory's mom said something very similar right before she passed away - she knew what was really important! She said she would have eaten more dessert.

Jane said...

Unfortunately, I totally follow these tips. My new years resolutions will be overwhelming this year.

KRISTA said...

I do give great advice don't I!!! Just kidding. By my figure, you can tell I totally follow it!

Burts said...

Andrea, I am thinking about using your last paragraph as some sort of vinyl in my house. I loved it!

McKinlay Family said...

You are one of my favs. I am at my parents and I feel like I have eaten enough to feed a small country. The best part is that I am not having to make any of it. I did have to buy my own diet coke, but I will be fine.